breathe.

I booked my ticket for NJ in July!!! I am so excited. a week off of work, all in which I get to go to the beach, se my loves from elon, and go to NYC for my cousins wedding and see my family! it's going to be wonderful. i just neeed to get away from work for a bit. it's just been so stressful lately. like to the point that yesterday i went home and after the slightest arguing with my mom I started sobbing...

but i have to go...break's over.

2 AM and she calls me 'cause I'm still awake,

"Can you help me unravel my latest mistake?,

I don't love him. Winter just wasn't my season"

Yeah we walk through the doors, so accusing their eyes

Like they have any right at all to criticize,

Hypocrites. You're all here for the very same reason

'Cause you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable

And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table

No one can find the rewind button, girl.

So cradle your head in your hands

And breathe... just breathe,

Oh breathe, just breathe

May he turned 21 on the base at Fort Bliss

"Just a day" he said down to the flask in his fist,

"Ain't been sober, since maybe October of last year."

Here in town you can tell he's been down for a while,

But, my God, it's so beautiful when the boy smiles,

Wanna hold him. Maybe I'll just sing about it.

There's a light at each end of this tunnel,

You shout 'cause you're just as far in as you'll ever be out

And these mistakes you've made, you'll just make them again

If you only try turning around.

2 AM and I'm still awake, writing a song

If I get it all down on paper, it's no longer inside of me,

Threatening the life it belongs to

And I feel like I'm naked in front of the crowd

Cause these words are my diary, screaming out loud

And I know that you'll use them, however you want to

But you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable,

And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table

No one can find the rewind button now

Sing it if you understand.

and breathe, just breathe

woah breathe, just breathe,

Oh breathe, just breathe,

<3

cowboy, take me away.

I love being home. don't get me wrong. but I feel like i am suffocating.  i am not used to all of the rules and regulations, i am not used to being made to ask to do anything before i do it. i am not used to my parents questioning my judgement. i am getting so sick of just staying in this house. all i do is work. and come home. and occasionally hang out with a friend.  but even then my parents will be like make sure you're home by a certain time. i had more freedom in highschool. 

and my siblings are driving me up the wall!!!  they go through my stuff, and take whatever they want. they are obnoxious and annoying. i mean i love them but they are driving me crazy.

ughhhh. okay. enough venting.

i'm gonna go lay out with what's left of the sunlight. 

i cannot wait till august!

b.

collide.

summer is progressing nicely.  Camp started on thursday and i am already wiped out. i love those kids but 9 hours a day with them is a bit much. whatevs, it's all for the money.

i think i am getting a second job as a receptionist on nights and saturdays. i neeed money.

last week, jo, ginny and i all went and got henna. from a real live indian lady, in her house! i lovveee mine. it's real pretty, and way more me than a real tattoo.

i can't wait to move my stuff into my apartment this month!! meg and i are going to drive out to elon and she's going to paint a mural on my wall!! i'm basically super stoked and i'm going to have the best apartment at EU [:

speaking of elon, i missss it!!! i love being home, but i miss the atmosphere and being around my friends 24/7.  can't wait to go up to new jersey in july. shit's gonna get crazzyyyy. 

that's all for now!

congrats to all my 2009ers. i love you guys!

<3

Tidal wave.

so, I have failed miserably at blogging for the last couple of weeks.

I really wanted to do the typical "oh my god, my freshman year is over, it's time for me to reflect" post, but i guess it's a little too late for that.

I will say this for my freshman year: it was crazy and wonderful and memorable and amazing.  It had it's ups and it's downs, there were times i thought i would die from loneliness, and other times when i thought i would burst from happiness. i made amazing friends and fell harder than anticipated for a guy. but i wouldn't change it for the world. basically, it was ideal. [:

now i am home! so far, summer hasn't been too eventful. there has been barbeques, birthday parties, and lazy, lazy pool days. i'm working on my tan, and trying to make money!

last night, whitney drove me home from work, and i didn't have my key with me. for about thirty minutes we brainstormed ways to get into my rather large two story house.  in the end, we decided on a ladder, which we used to climb onto a room, and then proceeded to pry a screen out of the bathroom window...

then b.fowler came over and we finished the night with swimming, laughing, and secret telling...vodka may have been involved... [;

i love summer. ♥

"I was so damn comfortable 'til you jumped into my ocean

I may not understand you, but I'm learnin' as I go

I'm just around the corner, child

Everything's changed

I didn't see you comin', but I, I love you anyway

I wanna give you somethin' to take, to take away the pain

I'm just ripples in your ocean, you're my tidal wave"